Dear ...:

I am writing to enter your "Dress for Success" Contest.

I need help.

That is, my boyfriend needs help.

Desperately.

For the past month, whenever he was home, he would wear LONG JOHNS. LONG UNDERWEAR, people. "They're comfortable!" he'd cry as the stains continued to accumulate. "They're gross!" I'd shout back, trying to identify the mystery stain on his left pant leg. It went on and on.

But first, some background.

We've enjoyed an amazing relationship lasting over two years, and most of which were spent in different cities, we have finally both found gainful employment in xxxx. I arrived last April, and he in December. In the middle of January, he landed a great job at the xxxx. We are both excited to be working at great jobs and enjoying all that xxxxxx has to offer.

However.

Having lived in several different cities over the past few years, his personal belongings are also scattered all over the province. Therefore, he relies on what bits and pieces that remained, or clothes he has received for Christmas gifts. Enter the LONG JOHNS.

Thankfully, he does not wear this atrocious piece of clothing outdoors - at least not with something else over them. But this is the best example I can think of of what state his wardrobe is in.

But here's the thing. The man can clean up good. I mean, really, really good. The man can work a business new like nobody's business (pardon the pun). He is a classy guy, despite evidence to the contrary.

This is an exciting time for both of us. We are both on the cusp of starting great new careers in our respective fields, and a well made, quality suit would surely give us a headstart on that path.

Plus, it would give me a reason to burn those rotten long johns.

For your enjoyment, I've also attached an 'artist's representation" of our current situation.

Thank your for your time and consideration,

Jenn